I'm a little cookie, yes i am and i was made by the cookie man and on my way from the cookie pan. a little piece broke off of me but i can taste just as good, uh-huh as a regular cookie can.

Dilemma // Thursday, June 28, 2012
2:33 AM
If you guys didn't know, I'm an express student (I am not trying to brag and I certainly do not look down on academic & technical students), but I have the urge to quit school. Really.

I know there are many detrimental consequences in quitting school. But I feel that education and academic results don't bring me far when I enter society, okay maybe it does. But 'O' levels, is 'O' level even compulsory? So what if I score well in my 'O's? So what if I get into the course I want? My ambition isn't big or whatever. I don't need to be in express stream to succeed or to archive my goals. I feel like dropping to normal academic, or best is technical. I feel that I belong in technical stream.

Firstly, I hate Science to the fucking core. And obviously I failed my science whether during common test or mid-year. I'm just not good in Science. And in technical stream I get to choose whether I want to study Science as a subject or not, but you don't get to choose if you're in the express stream. And the criteria to promote to Sec 3 express is way harder than getting promoted to Sec 3 technical. You have to pass your overall to promote to Sec 3 express, but Science is pulling down my overall. Urgh. And it's also pulling down my aggregate.
Secondly, there's E-Business Suite (EBS) in technical stream. I don't exactly know what it is. But I roughly know what ebs is about. I want to go to Business Management in polytechnic. And ebs is something like that isn't it? I don't see any point studying history, geography, chemistry, physics, all this are useless and nothing relates to Business Management, except for mathematics (which I apparently love) so fuck express stream alright.

But I know I can never drop to technical, I mean I can but nobody supports me at all. But I strongly feel that I belong there.. Since I can't go to the stream I like, I might as well just quit school. Although I am 14 only, but I know if I go out and work I can earn at least 2k per month. And 2k is a lot of money for a Sec 2 girl. I can also lessen my dad's burden. But he will kill me if I quit school anyway.

I am really stuck in this situation. Should I? Or should I not?

I want to quit so badly. But I can't bear to leave 2E2, my schoolmates & my beloved basketball teammates and my coaches. I know EXACTLY what I want but there are so many obstacles ahead and so many people I cannot let go yet. And I feel terrible. I go to school with no heart to study. My friends used to be my motivations, but now they don't motivates me anymore.. What should I do? Strive for what I believe in or just do what I am expected to do?

Really confused, really lost.